Wednesday, June 13, 2012


I saw my brother's hand today, first time seeing it in something other than a picture. 

If you stopped by last week, you'll remember he was in a car accident and they amputated part of his middle finger. They also shaved down one bone because he had lost too much "meat" off of the finger. 

I watched my brother's face as he went to show me his hand, you could see in his eyes he wasn't sure what my reaction would be. Honestly it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I was curious, he let me inspect at my desired distance. I watched him show his 4 year old son. I listened to him explaining it was his choice to look at it, and he didn't have to if he didn't want to. He could ask questions whenever he needed to. 

It wasn't until my brother & I sat alone in the living room that I asked him how he was feeling about seeing his hand. His only concern was other people. His fiance, not wanting to hold his hand or be near it. His son being terrified of it. It broke my heart a little. He was okay with it, as best as anyone could be. The only thing that kept him on edge was the response of others. 

I've worked at a couple gas stations, dealt with people that look different, it's never phased me. I know not to stare, and very rarely if ever find myself staring. Some people stare, my sister for example, I have many times had to turn her away from staring at someone. Awkward. But sometimes we can't help what draws our attention, what makes us curious.

A hasn't seen his hand, and probably won't until it's healed. I know she won't understand till she is older, but I hope we can help her understand. I hope she grows up and can be like me, and not stare. I hope differences in people physically like that won't draw her attention for much longer than a quick second. 

It's the stares and curiosity of people that hurt others like my brother the most. Though we can't always ask what happened or why, if we do get a chance we should. People have stories. Just remember when you're out and you see someone that is a little different, try not to stare, make eye contact, remember they are someone, they have a story. Push your curiosity back away from their knowing eyes. 

Linking up with Shell today.


AudreyN said...

I hope once its healed his son won't be so terrified. And that once he is older he understands. Its never an easy thing, but it will get better.

Shell said...

The stares make it harder. I hope that he gets used to it- and that others learn not to stare.

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